Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Life is Hard...But Worth It!

Every once in a while I will look up and ask God, "Why?"

Things that are hard:
Learning to live with someone on a daily basis.
Being that persons punching bag on his most difficult days.
Loving that person even when you cannot stand to look at him.
Loving that person so much it hurts.
Being vulnerable.
Opening up to that person giving him the chance to rip your heart out.

Those are just fears I have, he really is not that mean ;). But it is worth the heart aches I may experience, because he is truly my best friend! And he loves me more than anything.

Knowing that such a small person depends on you for everything is scary.
Having to be a "mean mommy" to teach them something.
Something my mom said to me when I was a kid, "You don't have to like me right now, I am your mommy and I am raising you to be the kind of person I would want as my friend as an adult".
Seeing them get a boo-boo.
Knowing when to let them go and trusting that God is watching them.
Knowing when to listen to advice.
When to ask for help or just do it on my own.
Trusting that you have done a good job teaching them so they will make wise decisions.
Loving them when they make bad decisions.

Being a mom is the most rewarding challenge I have ever taken on. I love it even when I want to rip my hair out and run down Main street screaming!

3)Being Myself!
I know there are people who do not like me and that hurts, so I think "Maybe if I was like...that peron would like me"
Learning to want to be in my own company.
Being proud of me when I accomplish something.
Being OK with going unnoticed. (Its OK if nobody reads my blog it still gets things off my chest.)
Having faith that I am liked by the right people.
Hey God made me and he does not make junk!
Liking what I see in the mirror is good, I am not narcissistic for thinking I look good.

I have to choose to love me!

4)Being in an extended Family!
I am still a daughter, sister, niece, aunt, cousin, grand daughter.
Finding the balance between my side and his.
*side note: I love that my parents are willing to celebrate Jesus' birthday on a day that is not Dec 25th, considering scholars have different ideas to when he was born*
I refuse to take a backseat to anyone when it comes to family, and I refuse to put my husband and sons in the backseat.
Loving in-laws for who they are.
Boundaries are very important!

Family is very important and I want them close but I also need my time with just us 4...and just me ;)

When you are little its getting together to play barbies and hand slapping games and watching princess movies.
Being grown up mommy friends means coordinating lunch at Chick-fil-a (so you can talk while the kids play)
Its understanding that even though you don't see each other all the time it doesn't mean she is not thinking about you.
It's making time to see each other.
Picking up the phone and calling her because she may need a break for a minute.
She is not yelling no at you...
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Time apart makes time together more special.
Taking time for your friends with no kids is important too.
Sometimes you have to be the bigger person and apologize.
Not all my close friends have met me face to face and that is OK with me.
I miss my old friends, I think about them often.
It is OK to make new friends.

I love my friends!

So even though life can be difficult, think about what is important and think about the love you have! Its worth the headaches! Love with all you have and trust that life is good. God is good!


pez*dispenser said...

You're so inspiring! :)
I love you.
Merry Christmas my wonderful cousin!

Raena said...

You know I'm always thinking of you! you need to move next door to me. i love you.

AJ said...

D:I love my sweet cousin and I am glad I can inspire.
R:I love you too! Believe me I try to convince D of it too!

Excellent Parent said...

I realized I didnt leave a coment, I thought I had! Bless you! Kids are such a blessing! And difficult!


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